Is the Church a Friend to Survivors of Abuse?
After 6 years, I left an abusive relationship with an X partner (we were NOT married) in October 2004. He had verbally, emotionally, psychologically, and sexually abused me since the birth of my daughter in October 2001. He also had abused my daughter physically, as well as in many of the same ways that he'd abused me, since she began crawling. He also neglected her. After leaving this relationship, I moved in with my parents and began attending church with them. I soon gained custody of my daughter and we prepared for a new life together. Then the courts decided that they were going to give my X partial/joint custody. He would have her 4 days a week while I'd only have her 3 days. The courts began transitioning and preparing my daughter for this, I grew angry with God, questioning why He would allow this to happen. Well, to make a long story short, I once again chose to leave the church. Two of the church's 4 pastors new full well what I'd gone through and what was currently going on and yet not 1 phone call. I felt as though the church didn't care about me. I began seeing the church as my enemy. I feel as though they condemned me for having not been married because then somehow, magically, I wouldn't have gone through this abuse. Needless to say, I have yet to return to this or any other church. This church had claimed that they wanted to meet people wherever they were at and yet I found that to be a lie. This makes me wonder if any church truly wants to embrace and care for its members. I wonder if any church is truly friendly and caring. I have found the church to be filled with toxic Christians who shoot the wounded and condemn the victim. Yet, I know that this isn't how it should be. I know that this isn't how God wants His church to behave. I am told this in 3 specific places in the Bible: Romans 15:1-7, Galatians 6:2 ("Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."), and Colossians 3:12-14. Unfortunately it has been my experience that the church doesn' behave this way though. The church is filled with imperfect, human people, many of whom have no idea of what it feels like to have been abused. These people don't understand the scale of the pain, and thus it is easy for them to be insensitive enough to brush it aside as a minor inconvenience in a way no fellow survivor would even consider. I encourage you, my fellow church members, to consider your actions and how Christ would look upon them. I believe that you would find yourself agreeing that it is not spiritual to stand in the line of fire when you can walk away. I yearn for the day when I am able to find a church that is able to be my friend. I yearn to find a church that is able to truly forgive and accept me in all my humanness. If you're a member of such a church, praise God! If not, I encourage you to strive to help your church become the type of church that accepts and helps heal survivors of abuse in the same way as Christ Himself would accept and help these survivors to heal. Brenda Hoffman has been delivering holistic health and wellness advice for over 7 years since receiving a BA in psychology. As a home-based professional and mother of 1, she operates a holistic wellness network. She invites you over to http://www.yourhealthyfamilyhome.com/ to learn how to improve you and your family's health. |
Other Horse Racing Articles
Preview Of August's UK Horse Racing If Wimbledon in June means strawberries and cream, then racing in August can only signify Goodwood and York, two flagship festival meetings that dominate the month’s action beginning with five exciting days on the Sussex slopes.As popular as ever, Glorious Goodwood offers some top-class action and is often a meeting that puts profits in p ...NY Giants Keys to Success Against Colts The time is coming, only four more days until the opening Sunday of the NFL season. The season actually starts on Thursday, but with the injury to Ben Roethlisberger, that matchup is far from intriguing. With a healthy Roethlisberger, I would say that this game would be in the bag for the Steelers, but I can’t say I have much confidence in Cha ...Australia - Something For Every Traveler If you want to travel somewhere that's full of diverse sights and experiences, then Australia is the place for you. Whatever you're looking for, chances are that the 'Land Down Under' can provide it. It's possible to take multiple vacations in the one visit.For those who love big cities, then you can stay in Sydney or one of the other c ...Bicycle Rims Review The first bicycle wheels were from a horse drawn cart, made of wood with a metal band round the bicycle rim, very hard and very uncomfortable to ride. Then a man called Dunlop (Scottish) invented the pneumatic tire, this along with Macadam (another Scot) inventing the tar road surface made cycling a lot more comfortable.The bicycle rim, l ...Beat Roulette - The Only Way To Beat Roulette & Win Big Is Many players try to beat roulette by buying roulette system they buy for hundreds of dollars. These systems massive riches and promise to make the buyer huge gains and beat roulette consistently.The reality is these systems are ALL fail.You lose money at roulette and never beat it and the only person who wins is the person who sold ...Politicians Want to Protect us From the Evils of On-Line Gambling Part 1 This is part 1 of a multipart series of articles regarding proposed anti-gambling legislation. In this article I discuss the proposed legislation, what the politicians say it does, some facts about the current state of online gambling, and what the bills really propose.The legislators are trying to protect us from something, or are they? ...Bullying At School Can Lead To Later Problems At Work! Simon admitted that he had always been an underachiever. Fidgeting nervously, he told me that also had problems with completing tasks – indeed he constantly found that he missed deadlines and let down his colleagues and clients.I asked him when this behaviour had started – and he replied that he couldn’t remember ever being any different. ...Motivation: No Finish Lines There is a saying that goes something like “getting to the top is easy, the hard thing is staying there once you get there."There’s a reason the above statement is so true. It has to do with this interesting little quirk we humans have: our belief in finish lines. Deep with in our brains we have this belief that once we arrive, we can rel ...Our 'Usual' Streams of Consciousness I used to think that my stream of consciousness was static and around the same level mostly. Awareness eventually dawned on me that we have an unbelievable ‘tuning’ device if we will loose of the rigid way of thinking that pervades most of society. As I read more and became aware of my own different states at any time of the day, I decided that ...The Difference Between Bankroll and Money Management I am sure you would have heard comments like, 'if you don't have good money management skills then you simply won't win'; or how about 'money management is much more important than the selection strategy used'; or even 'you won't win if you don't have good money management skills'. There will always be a group of punters who is always bleating a ...Money & The Perfect Square Of Life Simplicity Stands For ‘Optimum Necessity’, even in regards to Money. ‘Optimum Necessity’ is God’s highest and most ingenious law. Why is everybody not only chasing after money, but also unnecessarily ascribing ‘power’ to it?Money is paper with ungodly (Caesar) faces on it, the #1 scary offense against the idolatry-commandment, and the fir ...Playing Chess in Russia - The Agony of Victory Russians have a thing for chess and, frankly, are very good at it. Being from San Diego, I thought chess was something you put photo albums in.Playing ChessPlaying chess requires thinking ten or twelve steps ahead. If I wanted to understand the Russian mind, I had to learn to play chess. If nothing else, it would be a good way to p ...Long Distance ATV Riding and Racing ATVs are a shear blast of adrenalin and excitement. Just giving it full throttle and then and sending up a roster tail behind you as you cut sideways and then jet off in another direction at full-speed. Jumping is also fun and often you just have to go back and do it over and over again to get your fill of the rush of energy and feeling of leavi ...Guides Part 1 A guide is a being who assists you in the completion of a task. It doesn’t mean that the guide does the task for you, or takes your power, or leaves you in financial ruin, or belittles you, or demeans you. You could encounter a guide who will come in the guise of a rude being. But part of the lesson might be that you stand up for yourself, t ...Race Equipment Checklist for Mountain Bike Racers I remember my first mountain bike race. Whenever I showed up, and was just about to change into my cycling outfit, I realized that I hadn't packed my clothes! Just kidding. But the reason I remembered them is that I had a checklist of everything I would need. I don't want you to forget anything, so I decided to put my list online.You ...Vegas Odds & Ends (Jan. 20) Folks aren't necessarily talking baseball when they say World Series these days.They might mean golf's old World Series, the long-running World Series of Poker or the relatively new Orleans Annual Horseplayer World Series, which begins Thursday, Jan. 21, and runs through Saturday, Jan. 23.The event costs $1,000 to enter and players ...The Long & Winding Road to the Roses It's a long and winding road to Churchill Downs and the first Saturday in May, but the Thoroughbred set is atwitter about Breeders' Cup Juvenile champion Stevie Wonderboy, who is slated to make his 3-year-old debut Saturday in the $150,000 San Rafael Stakes at Santa Anita.No Juvenile champion has ever gone on to capture the Kentucky Derby ...One Pocket Billiards Game One pocket billiards is the billiards answer to soccer, while 14.1 continuous billiards is the billiards answer to basketball’s horse. Requiring to shooter to specialize in specific types of shots, in on pocket billiards the table is cut from six pockets for shots to two open pockets. You don’t have to call what ball will go into that pocket but ...Terrorists Again - 14 Prayers to Protect Your Family In the last 2 weeks or so, I have been posting some prayers to deal with specific issues that my readers have mentioned to me.You find prayers to help you attract whatever it is you want more of in your life.Maybe it's:* More money - to meet your needs and more* A new car - go where you want to go, safely and in the ...Where Are You, God? Do you ever have one of those days when you wonder if God is really there? Does he really exist? If he does, then why can't you see Him or even sense His presence? Why do you feel so desolate, so alone? I was in that place a few days ago.I stood at my window facing south on a cold winter's day. The hardwood trees were bare of leaves and I ...The Power of Love “There must be a higher love/Without it life is wasted time.” Those are the opening words to one of my favorite Steve Winwood songs. What could a higher love mean in your life – in the life of your clients?Often, during a speaking engagement, I include a potent and important word that has people flinch — “Love.” They try to manage their f ...What Is God? There are many names and descriptions of God. Rather than do a historical thesis about the names and roles of God I will attempt to explain to you what God is and is not. God is different to every person individually. No one person can give God a definitive and thus limiting definition. Other writers of various religious books have said that ...Hunter Jumper Horses Jumper courses are very demanding, calling for technical accuracy on the part of the rider and absolute obedience from the horse. Connecting with the horse from the hind legs, through the back to the bit will prevent most of resistance problems that horses have with jumping. As the riders head toward the jump, they focus on the rhythm of your ho ...10 Steps to Christian Success 1) Spend time with Jesus Christ every single day. I cannot stress that enough for the success minded Christian. So often we spend our time working on things that have no bearing on our future christian success (nor any current success value) because we haven’t taken the time to focus and understand what Jesus Christ wants for our lives and our ...Who Will Lead the Kentucky Derby? Horse racing is multi-dimensional. It's a spectacle in the spring, a good bet the rest of the year. Sometimes it seems as entertaining when it's routine. If people new to the game like what they see at the majors, it's not so bad mid-week, year-round, either.For the 132nd edition of the Run of the Roses on Saturday many may already have t ...Horse Racing 101: What You Absolutely Need to Know Horse racing is perhaps one of the oldest sports in America. The charisma and aura of the game is such that it refreshes and revitalizes your spirits. If taken in the right sense i.e. not as a gamble with your limited money, horse racing is one of the best and conspicuous sports to play.Before taking on to this game, one needs to have a v ...Sports - America's Obsession If you watch situation comedies, the one thing that you will notice, or at least should notice, is that situation comedies make fun of real life situations. That's why they're funny, because they're all about things we can relate to. On an episode of "Home Improvement" Jill asks Tim if he's ready to go with her to some party. He replies by te ...Make Sure the Price is Right on Your Residential Letting With so many people entering the Buy to let market in the UK, Ireland, France, Spain and other countries it is very important get the rental price competitive. This applies just as much if it is a long-term letting or a self-catering holiday rental.If you have just purchased a residential letting property and have a mortgage you na ...The New Billionaires For the twelfth straight year, Bill Gates continues to be the richest man in the world with a net worth of $50 billion, according to the authoritative Forbes magazine, the business world's bible of wealth and fortune. Microsoft's founding father may be less active in the corporate world these days, but he still sits comfortably at the top of the ...Derby Race is On While most eyes will be focused on Motown's Super Bowl this weekend, many orbs will be peering through binoculars at tracks in Florida and Southern California as horse racing moves another couple steps toward the Kentucky Derby.First Samurai, the highly-touted son of 2000 Kentucky Derby champion Fusaichi Pegasus and third place finisher i ...The Calgary Stampede and Exhibition The Calgary Stampede and Exhibition is rich in tradition and it is also known for the cowboy atmosphere that takes over the city, everybody gets out the cowboy boots and Stetsons for the 10-11 days of good fun. This year (2006) it starts with the Calgary Stampede Parade on July 7th. Calgary's dedicated volunteers and community supporters prese ...Energy Enhancement, Energy Blockages and The Removal Of Fear The fear of having nothing. The fear of death, even when this is not likely to happen soon, can cause you to take the stupid slave-like path in life.As Jesus Christ said -"Look at all the lilies in the field. They toil not, neither do they spin...." they do not fear.Fear is one of the major symptoms of energy blockages in the Base ...Country House Hotels North Yorkshire England We have visited several luxury Country House Hotels in North Yorkshire in the North of England and trust that the following will help in your search for suitable exclusive Country House Hotels in this beautiful rural part of England. This area of the country has numerous old English market towns and villages located within the National Parks of ...
|
